"The roots of many mental disorders can be traced back to the dismissal of reality."
This didn't really shock me or confuse me, but it really stood out to me. This fact is so true. I remember as a kid trying to get my parents to get me tested for ADHD because I was always losing things, forgetting to do things, forgetting to bring things with me, and was having a very hard time concentrating in class. My parents never did. They just said that I was making excuses for slacking off. They took my troubles with remembering things as just being a slacker and not really caring about my school. Instead of getting me the help that I really could have used, I would just get in trouble and grounded for things like losing my homework or procrastinating on assignments.
A year ago I got myself tested for ADHD. It turns out that I did have it. I wish my parents would have gotten me tested when I had asked them to. Maybe things would be a lot easier for me. I have struggled with schooling for years. I have gone in and out of the junior college. I would not be able to stay focused and would end up forgetting to do homework. I would fall behind and then drop classes after the drop date. I have struggled with my ADHD quite a bit. I do not want to take the medication route. I am attempting to retrain my mind. I am working on Behavior Modification Therapy. It has been helping so far. I am not forgetting things as much. I have some bad days though, where I forget a lot of the things that I need or need to do.
My parents still to this day say that I do not have ADHD. They say that I just need to stop forgetting to do my homework and need to focus better. My 3 year old is starting to show signs of ADHD. When I talk to my mother about it, all she says is that she is just being a 3 year old. That could be, but she is also a lot more active than other children her age. She is constantly on the move. She is starting to have behavior issues. My parents still dismiss a lot of things. I hope some day they can move on from their dismissal and accept that their may be something mentally that was causing me to act out so much as a teenager.
Hello Michelle,
ReplyDeleteI really appreciate that you are sharing your personal and private experiences with all of us. It is amazing how parents have selecting hearing. I have had similiar experiences with my parents, although not extreme as yours. It also makes me think how as adults we are determined to not make the same mistakes as they did. We vow to be better parents in how we listen and stay in tune with our children's feeling and actions.
Thanks for sharing,
Mandy Ericson
Hi Michelle,
ReplyDeleteThank you for sharing your experience with us!
Your post has me thinking about the multiple ways we learn from our parents both conspicuously through the lessons they teach us, but also inconspicuously through their attitudes and the behaviors they model.
You clearly felt something was an issue, but dismissal kept you from being able to address it. What's amazing about this essay is that I, and most people, never think about dismissal as a lie. We might call it ignorance, tiredness, or find another excuse, but we never consider the consequences of the dismal, which often amount to a lie.
Thanks for giving me more to think about.
Take care,
Lauren
Michelle,
ReplyDeleteI agree that parents like to dismiss things that can be a serious issue. I believe that it may be because they don't want to believe what may be the truth, or not enough evidence to show proof of such conditions, or problems are just not taken serious enough. When dismissal because a habit and not enough action has been made, they will face consequences in the end.
It's great that you choose a quote that you have a personal connection with. I can't imagine what it is like to have ADHD as I have always been a quiet kid but parents with selective hearing/memory. It is truly funny sometimes what people choose to hear and remember and other times very frustrating. All of my Dad's side like to one up each other which leads to things being remembered and heard selectively. It's great that you know you have it now and are able to help your daughter.
ReplyDelete